I have a heart of iron.

I am like a lion.

I eat beef.

I am chief.

I be strong.

I be wrong.

Iron like the lion in sion.

Cheap travel in India

Here's what i've figured out about traveling. The biggest expenses when traveling are usually i) getting there and ii)Staying there.

That might seem like a no brainer, but it really isn't. If the actual act of traveling is about getting somewhere (rather than comfort and luxury), then you can save a lot of money on traveling. The prices a ticket on the same train can vary from 95 rupees to 2500 rupees. The only tickets that area always available are the cheapest, in the unreserved compartment. The ticket only gives you the right to enter the train, not the right to a seat. If you board the train anywhere after the station where it originates, you're unlikely to get a seat. That means that you will be sharing the floor and passageways with drunks, tribals on the way to a funeral, the occasional bunch of soldiers in the wrong compartment, obese men from central delhi, with their wives feeding them, labourers on the way home and hungry uncoordinated men dropping sambar on your backpack.

While this is cheap, I can't do this sort of travel too often (but, i do plan to do it tomorrow, from Kolkata to Jamshedpur). It's very tiring. Now, the next category of ticket, (sleeper class) I think, isn't too expensive either. A couple of hundred bucks at the most. But the problem is, unless you book it in advance, you're not going to get a ticket. If the train is popular, you need at least a few weeks. A few days is alright for a faraway destination that doesn't get too many travelers (for instance, Ballarshah). 3 tier a/c tickets are hard to come by, while 2 tier a/c tickets are slightly easier. But the problem is that they're much more expensive (if available).

If you want to fly, you're not getting a ticket at short notice for anywhere less than a few thousand (unless you're really lucky). And I don't enjoy flights anyway, they go against the spirit of traveling in India.

So, the secret to traveling really cheap is planning ahead. Now I know this goes against the essence of backpacking, but, it helps. If you know you're going to be going to hyderabad, just walk to railway station anywhere, and you can book a ticket. Of course, as with anything in india, booking ticket from different stations can be a bit complicated (quotas and nonsense), which is why, there is the very beautiful irctc.com or indianrail.gov.in

Its the same with bus tickets. If you can, find out where the bus leaves from, and if you can book a ticket in advance (you usually can't for state transport buses). It's also the same with getting to the airport, in case you do take the flight. In hyderabad, i paid 600 bucks to take a call-cab to the airport, since i overslept and missed the bus that costs 100 bucks.

So, be early, be on time, and you can travel cheap.

(Ironically, i type this post at 1 am, when i shuold be up at 4.30 for a 6.55 train to Jamshedpur, from where I need to get to Hazaribagh, and I have NO idea how to do that.)

Good things

"All good things are simple."

That much, I know is true. And there are NO exceptions to that. If its not simple, its not good. Can apply to anything, friends, relationships, jobs, martial arts, food, people. Anything. And there is nobody in the world who can counter this (if they can, they're a little screwed in the head, and need to figure themselves out)

And yet, despite knowing it, I keep looking for complicated. Of course, now that I know the mistakes I make, I try to make them less, but I still make them.

The craziest night ever - part 1

After 2 weeks of being nowhere near the coffee, I finally found a small restaurant (the Rasraj Pure Veg), which actually whipped up a really nice glass of cold coffee. I had two, and the caffeine kept me up for the crazy night ahead.

I bought a ticket train ticket for 98 rupees from Chandrapur to Hyderabad. That's about 400 km, and 98 bucks is a good deal. Except of course, there isn't a seat reserved in your name, so if you don't get a seat, you have to share the floor with a third of humanity.

I had two hours to kill before the train got there, so I plonked my bag on the platform, and settled down to reading Romeo and Juliet. Romeo was deep in conversation with the Friar, when an old, tottering man walked past, staring at me. He paused a

moment, and then said to me in garbled English, "Eshcuse me, where are you to going?" Now, for some reason, my backpack attracts a fair amount of attention in these parts, and I didn't think much of it. "Hyderabad," i said, expecting him to go away.

But he didn't. He decided to come talk to me for the most insane conversation I have been in.

Switching between his crazy english and slurry Hindi, he says, "I know you. I know you very well. The moment I saw you, I knew, you are a great person. Wonderful. You will be very great." Ok, i thought, another drunk looking for someone to buy him

a peg. I've been there, i have pity.

Me : Thank you.

Drunk : No no.... see I know everything about you. (in english) Whatsh ya edducasion?

me: er... BA.

Drunk : BA? What's this BA.

Me : Arts (as, i look away and pretned to read my book again)

Drunk : I don't know this arts... what it is... i don't.

Me : (smile)

Drunk : I know your marks... you got First class, yea? You got 63 percent.

At this point, I was a little, how shall we say, surprised. Oddly, I did get around that much in my BA exam. OK, So, i was a little surprised, but that's a guess that anybody could have made. I don't really look like the kind of person who's ever aced an exam (also I won the spelling prize in 2nd standard), and I don't look like the kind who flunked too many exams (I am, actually, but i don't look it), so its an average score like 63 is a good guess to make.

Drunk : So, you have a job?

Me : er, no, not really.

Drunk : What do you do then?

Me : I, er, i'm just traveling.

Drunk : now, see, how's that gonna help? See the thing with you is, you don't have the guts. You got all the opportunity, you could do whatever you want, but you

just don't do it. So you run around, wandering here and there. Guts. You see, lemme give you a piece of advice. Only because I know you, ok? So, you know, you have a problem with your parents. That's true. BUt you gotta choose. See, you gotta love them, and then you'll go really far. Trust me. Otherwise you'll just be like this, you'll just wander around like this, and you'll never really be able to send home any money.

Now, this is interesting (and unsolicited) advice from a random drunk. Not that i needed it, but I couldn't argue with any of it. The best I could do was sit there and laugh.

Then, the drunkasauraus tells me about his life. His name i

s MS Kulkarni and he was an engineer in the Electricity Department. He did a course in engineeringing (but not a degree) and then got a job in the department. He kept getting promoted untill he became an assistant engineer (which isn't actually very high up). All his 4 daughters got married into good homes, though, and one of his son in-laws earn's a lakh a month, and so she doesn't need to work. His son works in a company call BEL, and he's doing pretty well too.

He says, "See, I could have been really succesful. I could have been a nice person. But, I drink."

I'm still laughing when I say, "so why don't you stop?"

Drunk : You, see the problem is, that my wife... my w

ife, see, my wife won't give me any.

Me : Give you any ... what?

Drunk : Sex.

Me: (still laughing, and noticing that the other passangers are laughing too) So, maybe if you stopped drinking, she would.

Drunk : no no no ... i tried once, i tried to stop drinking, but no. No sex. So I get bored. So i drink.

Me : ha ha ha ... so, tell me something else that's interesting about me.

Drunk : You want interesting. Ok. I'll tell you what. How many friends do you have.

Me : Well, you know, a lot.

Drunk : Close friends?

Me : Maybe ... two or three?

Drunk : Well, one of your close friends will betray you.

Me : ok .... ?

Drunk : and your friend's name... begins with S.

At this point, i was a little ... shocked. You see, the girl that just broke up with me a few weeks ago, her name starts with S. To be honest, she didn't betray me, but he was drunk, so a little inaccuracy is allowed.

At this point, i was about to believe that this man had some sort of wierdly functioning, alcohol-fueled psychic sense. And then, he says this.

Drunk : I predict you'll get married within the next year. An

d don't worry, she'll be really beautiful, and you'll love her, and your parents will love her. But, yea, you have to make sure that she has long hair. And if she has long hair, don't even allow her to cut it.

Me : Long hair? Why?

Drunk : Because.... long hair is really sexy.

again, i launch into a fit of laughter.

Drunk : and i'll tell you how to know. First you kiss her. When you kiss do, suck her lips like you're sucking a mango. You know how to suck a mango (and here he makes a sucking face, grossing me out). If she sucks back like she's sucking a mango, then she loves you. If not, move on to the next girl.

Advice noted.

Drunk : and then, on the wedding night, you gotta be gentle. First she'll say 'no', so you don't force her, yea. Be gentle. Kiss her. Then you take her clothes off. And then you gotta be slow. Then when she lets you, you wrap her legs around your neck and then you do her.

Not only am i clutching my stomach in laughter, but half the station can hear this man... because he's not quiet. The funny thing is, i'm getting sex advice from a man who's wife won't sleep with him.

He then goes on into explaining to me, very graphica

lly, how to tell if she's a virgin. "But you see," i say, "Now a days it doesn't really matter." "Look," he says, "you asked me to tell you something interesting, now if you don't wanna take this advice, don't but i'm going to give it to you."

Then, as soon as it started, its over. He gets up and says, "I'm going to my bags, take care." No mention of money, he's gone.

Here's a pic of him.

Now all that's left of the night is me sprinting with a full backpack, making some random friends, watch the train get stormed by cops with armour and AKs, and almost get on their wrong side. Thats for the next post, i'm going to work out for a while now.

Women

When you hit the road, whatever your aims and objectives, if you have them, are, there's always a thought in the back of your mind, that you're going to meet a beautiful woman. 

So, picture this. There I was in, in the middle of nowhere, 200 kms from the nearest railway station. In a hospital run by Gandhians. All about me are men and women whose faces look like sunken skulls, there for free treatment. I'm sitting there, waiting for the bus. I've been told it comes in thirty minutes, so I take the time to bid adieu to the good lady doctor, who's husband is away, so she's swamped in work, and sweating from an emergency operation. So i'm sitting at the table, watching her look at tribal kids with rashes andmen who got drunk and hit their heads and women who will whisper in her ear and all kinds of things. 

Keep in mind that i'm leaving the place in ten minutes.

And i'm chatting with the good lady doctor about how the govt. doesn't care (it doesn't) and how the poor boy may not make it and how I incidentally happened to get a professor she hated fired. And i'm about to say, "ok, I'm going to take your leave, it was very nice meeting you...."

And suddenly, out of nowhere, in walks the most beautiful girl. She's tall, with a complexion that's almost glowing in the dingy room. She's speaking marathi, of course, (cos everyone's speaking it there), but she has a slight lilt to it. As it turns out, she's a doctor, but she works somewhere else. The two doctors talk shop for a while, and I, too shocked to say anything, just watch. Then this little kid comes in, with an injury on his leg. When this new, beautiful, doctor look at it, her face crinkles up, and you can see the pain in her eyes, almost like she's feeling it herself. 

I had to stop myself from falling in love right there. All i could do is sit there and dig her. I didn't say a word. 

The older doctor, who i've spent the past few days with, looks at her and says, "Hmm, so this is a surprise, seeing you dressed up all ethic." This girl is wearing a light brown salwaar kameez, with a dupatta wrapped around her neck. She was like the image of perfect, innocent beauty. And i just sat there, digging her. 

You know, i'd like to meet a girl like that. Who's beautiful, and smart, and cares for things that every else doesn't. (if you're wondering where I got the smart from without talking to here, dude, she's a doctor)

So i just sat there, and smiled. This was a sign, from the god I don't believe  in. I just got out of a relationship 2 weeks ago. To be more accurate, the relationship was got out of me, without me doing much getting out. And I was screwed up in the head about that for a while. I'm not hung up on the girl who dumped me, but its pissing off to realise that everything you wanted to believe in the past year, doesn't exist. 

And then I see this girl, this angel from I don't know where, and i sit there digging her, and I smile to myself, and I know, I just knew, that things will  be alright.